Some of you may know me as the Owner of Positive Energy Dance Fitness for Women from over three years ago. I led many classes: Sensual Pole Dance, Dance Fit Diva, Belly Dance Fusion, Crazy Sexy Cool, Flirty Girl Booty Beat, and IntenSati. It was a lot of fun being a leader in the fitness industry.
I’ve been avoiding all cardio type classes in fear of whether I could do it. I’m not referring to the cardio part of it, but could I follow the foot work. Will I have the coordination? The left side of my body does not operate as smoothly as the right side of my body. Was I going to trip over my own feet? Was I going to fall? Was I going to run out of the class in frustration? Could I keep up with the instructor? Should I stand in the back?
I’ve been feeling some frustration with yoga balancing poses lately. Can I really balance when half my body is shaking? In this frustration, I’ve realized my body wants to dance. I desire to explore this form of movement now. I’m not abandoning my yoga. I’m just diversifying. I desire to explore different dance forms.
I attended a Jazzercise class on Thursday morning. I walked in with all my fears. You know what happened? My left shoulder was difficult to move with the beat of the music. I was behind and not with the tempo. My left arm was not swaying like my right. My left arm movement was smaller than the movement of my right arm. I was doing OK, hanging in there, but not as good as I would’ve done a year ago (pre-Parkinson’s).
I was getting frustrated and a little angry with this restricted, smaller movement of my body, until I realized something HUGE! I realized I walked in to class as a Parkinson’s patient unsure if I can keep up, so that’s the experience I created. Once I realized that, I changed my thinking to being ME, JONI, someone who loves to dance and move. I connected with the music, enjoyed the movement, and reached a little further with my left arm. This was a whole lot more pleasurable.
I even went back the next day for more.
My thoughts are powerful, just like yours. I’m grateful – I felt the fear and did it anyway.